Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
My Dad named our wireless network after my dead grandma. I refuse to look up porn on my dead grandma...
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Neighbors just bought a new bong. Got high with them and we decided to name it "Gary colemans sweet sugarlumps" these guys are hilarious
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
Randomize
