I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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