She said her name was "party"
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He ran into the room yelling "attack! Attack!", jumped on top of me on the air mattress, popped the air mattress, and then we had victory sex, because he was proud of popping it.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
We need to feng shui this bitch.
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
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