Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(315): View more from New York

Random question, how's your gag reflex these days

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(315): Random question, how's your gag reflex these days http://tfl.nu/0fku

Replies (10) Good night (4517) Bad night (827)
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(647): View more from Ontario

It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.

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(647): It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task. http://tfl.nu/hv7g

Replies (30) Good night (6078) Bad night (904)
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(301): View more from Maryland

she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is

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(301): she said if I bought her franzia she would blow me, and she would fuck me if I splurged on martini and rossi. Franzia it is http://tfl.nu/mseg

Replies (21) Good night (4487) Bad night (1025)
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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.

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(832): Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are. http://tfl.nu/ir1i

Replies (15) Good night (3726) Bad night (1175)
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(781): View more from Massachusetts

No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.

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(781): No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you. http://tfl.nu/cz2r

Replies (11) Good night (4434) Bad night (941)
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(918): View more from Oklahoma

It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.

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(918): It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever. http://tfl.nu/0i0j

Replies (31) Good night (858) Bad night (5839)
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(631): View more from New York

ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night

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(631): ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night http://tfl.nu/n1l5

Replies (9) Good night (4977) Bad night (810)
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(845): View more from New York

Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.

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(845): Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight. http://tfl.nu/mc2w

Replies (2) Good night (2013) Bad night (756)
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(313): View more from Michigan

#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.

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(313): #1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned. http://tfl.nu/f6q8

Replies (7) Good night (1484) Bad night (521)
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(312): View more from Illinois

That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.

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(312): That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison. http://tfl.nu/qs9j

Replies (22) Good night (1461) Bad night (705)
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(254): View more from Texas

I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.

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(254): I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire. http://tfl.nu/x5cn

Replies (11) Good night (2019) Bad night (554)
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(954): View more from Florida

The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that

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(954): The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that http://tfl.nu/l3dv

Replies (9) Good night (851) Bad night (472)
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(858): View more from California

There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.

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(858): There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie. http://tfl.nu/bbcq

Replies (5) Good night (1003) Bad night (266)
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(775): View more from Nevada

Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.

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(775): Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital. http://tfl.nu/63us

Replies (0) Good night (498) Bad night (227)
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(202): View more from Washington, DC

She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning.

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(202): She dressed up in a sexy maid outfit for me, but she got mad when I asked her to actually do some cleaning. http://tfl.nu/4ygc

Replies (9) Good night (1164) Bad night (540)

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