Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
We invited our waitress tonight to come too.... we told her she had lightning in her veins and in return she taught us a Texas Roadhouse dance so the logical next step was invite her to a kegger.
I walked into your room and you had fallen asleep smoking a cigarette. You just had the butt in your mouth with ash all over your face.
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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