I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
mallory made a planned parenthood decision maker flow chart again.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize