So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Was about to close the deal last night until he said he hadn't seen the Taylor Swift video. So I made him watch it before I let him have sex with me.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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