Joe is a total sociopath, I'm going to hook up with him tonight
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
he's the only person i know who can drink himself into and out of alcohol poisoning.
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize
