I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I just found a dead bug in my nose. if that's the worst thing up there im considdering myself lucky.
Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
He told me that he had never gotten a blow job. I sat there for a second, then thought "I MUST FIX THIS!" It was fucking fantastic.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
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