Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
the amount of times i have been intoxicated, barefoot, and in a robe at 3 am at the quick check by your house is impressive, especially since i live an hour away
Hey sorry for calling you so much last night. I mixed your number with the pizza guys, and he was running late
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize