who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
im on my way to getting "i just graduated college with no money, no job, and no plan" drunk
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Somehow I don't trust you in this state to talk to you about a colonoscopy
Spotted: woman loading franzia into a toddler-sized shopping cart for her child to push. Beautiful.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
First highlight of the semester: campus safety caught me peeing in the dirt parking lot by kappa. Then as they were about to write me up, they recognized me, laughed, and left.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
Its okay I found my bra. ...it was on your cat. I wont ask questions.
I don't have a cat..?
FUUUCK. sunburned vagina. this is the worst day ever. i'm not leaving my room until it peels.
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