What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
Randomize
