There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
i have a queen bed, a cherrywood bed frame, and gold sheets. how are you saying no to me right now?
Would you like season tickets to my vagina?
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
he's the kind of guy you give a fake number to and he still finds out your real number anyway...
Don't get into any trouble on your trip
The only foreseeable trouble would be pregnancy, but I gotta be sterile otherwise I'm beating some pretty fucking incredible odds
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
