real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
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