We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Dude you asked your tattoo if it wanted to go swimming
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
