i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
My sister was not impressed when she got here. I was standing in the doorway in my underwear drinking a beer. At 2pm. On a Monday.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Like I'm sorry but "it'll be fine trust me" IS NOT VERY REASSURING ASSHAT. Now take off your pants.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
PSA. Do not shart while wearing a jock strap at work. That is all.
Randomize
