Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
And then i made him answer questions about me before i took off my clothes
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
These 19 Guys Hit The Cougar Jackpot
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
35 Disappointing People Who Failed At Sexting
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister