She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
I'm already at the bar. It's 2 PM. Help
Although, to be fair, I am both willing and going to lick marshmallow fluff off of your dick.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
