I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
What was she thinking? I'm not in the business of charity fucks anymore.
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
My cat clawed my face because i tried to give it a foot massage...never doing shrooms again.
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
You drunkenly promised dick pics on your way out the door and then never delivered. I don't know how I'll ever be able to trust you again.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Randomize
