I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
I was going to make you have an awkward boner around all your coworkers but then I fell asleep.
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
