dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
