They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
The woman at walgreens tried to sell me clearance condoms with my fake eyelashes. Does it look like I get laid?
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
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He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
I kept petting the scarves and telling customers to "feel that shit"
Stop drinking at work.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
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id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
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