The Mets? Come back? That'd be like Nickelback writing a good song.
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He deserves someone who will touch his penis at 3 a.m.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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