Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
woke up at my desk with a paper in front of me that says "people stranded on islands love having wet dreams" what the fuck happened last night
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
