Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
Found out people don't like it when you get drunk at fundraising auctions and bid in foreign currencies.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Probably for the best. My morning wood is pretty horrible. I wouldn't want to tip the earth's axis/ create a new magnetic pole
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
Randomize
