I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
Definitely just found that pen in the microwave. What the fuck.
we tried to exchange flip flops in the parking lot and fell over then army crawled home
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
I am available for nakedness
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
