Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Randomize
