This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
She actually said during sex "the only thing that would make this more perfect is if we were listening to Lenny Kravitz"
So, obviously, you had to give a fake number this morning.
Yes. Also, we may never be able to go back to that bar again.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up to her staring at me in a corner moaning over and over again about how good the pie crust tasted
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Randomize