actually, I'm a sock model
im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Look, you don't know disfunction until you've sat on the john taking a shit and crying while totally sober.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
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