life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Okay, new plan. Get drunk, eat breadsticks. It's going to be great.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Woman doing my Brazilian right now says to tell you she says hi...what has our life come to?
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
