Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
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