i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were trying to sober you with hotdog buns but you refused put half of it in your bra and said you'd save it for later
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Ugh contemplating vodka and chocolate protein powder as this Capri sun and vodka isn't really cutting it
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
They cut me off when I tried to pee in the corner of the bar.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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