So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
You remember that guy Joey? The pastors son that plays Jesus every year?
Yeah?
Stuck it in his pooper.
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
Well supposedly when the cops came, they say I tried to get them in a conga line like Jim Carrey in The Mask. So....yea
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize