question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
we're a generation of lazy underachieving stoners and uncreative overachieving automatons. you're golden
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
All you kept saying was, " Barack fucking Obama. FUCK Michelle" and then you motorboated me.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
I'm just gonna eat nachos and wine fruit forever.
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
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