The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
