im in a kiddie pool, high, with a keg in arms reach. If i had a sandwich and a blowjob this would be the best day ever
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I should know better than to open your texts at the grocery store
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I let my daughters ex boyfriend take me home from the bar. Hey, at least he's old enough to drink
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
Randomize
