Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(202): View more from Washington, DC

if you wake up with plaid pants on your floor in the morning, you made a bad decision.

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(850): View more from Florida

I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts

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(703): View more from Virginia

Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"

(571): View more from Virginia

you make me proud to be your friend

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(916): View more from California

A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.

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19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
Read it at the TFLN blog
(420): View more from

So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth

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(403): View more from Alberta, CA

i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts

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(907): View more from Alaska

It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?

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(+27): View more from South Africa

A stripper choked me last night. Then I choked her. Now we're going on a date this Saturday.

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