i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize
