Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I just peed in my kitchenbs sinlk. New low- maybe. am i embarrassed? Not in the least
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Im too awkward for one night stands. I need to hire someone to come clear them out of my bed before I wake up.
Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
so i was dancing to the glee soundtrack with highheels. i tripped. and the dildo fell on my face. i dont know what happened.
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
idk what to be more embarrassed/confused about, that i lost my underwear or that i woke up covered in fried rice
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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