my mkouth tastes houw teh zoo smelllls
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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