he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
my affection for youporn is starting to get disturbing... i just thought about sending them a christmas card
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
Yeah I had to push her down the hallway to the hotel room in a luggage carrier. The guy at the desk told me goodluck
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
Far too many of our conversations end in us talking about sperm
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
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