whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I woke up with the new contact "Britney Both Nipples Pierced"... how do you think the night went?
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
I dont even remember coming home... All my stuff is strewn randomly around my apartment... And I woke up at 5 sitting propped up in my bed with just my arm in a shirt
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.