she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
he is so obsessed with the fact that he works at Apple
i know, its like he jerks off to steve jobs
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
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And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
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I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
LET ME HAVE MY JUDGMENT OF OTHER PEOPLE
Randomize