Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Am I required to send a Christmas card to my fuck buddy?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
Randomize