look no pants
I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
It took you an unbelievable amount of time to realize that your ass was on fire.
You told me you were allowed to keep eating butter because it had just passed midnight and you were on the next day's daily fat servings
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Im shooting goldshlager and waxing my crotch
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
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