Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
He was like a foghorn with a huge penis.
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
Your vagina is not a steamboat from the 1800's
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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