Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
