I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
I don't know who's more excited for you to come home. Me or my vagina
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
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