Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Stole every fake plant from the lobby and placed it in front of you're apartment door, Enjoy!
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Two words: blizzard sex
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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