Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I was too drunk to read the menu, let alone her body language.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
Just a heads up before you get home. Took the shelves out of the fridge so i could fit the beer ball and bucket of riot punch. Apparently i decided the stove was the best place to keep them. They got cooked when we pre heated to cook a bird we shot. This may be the final straw for our security deposit
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
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