Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
from the looks of the bare footprints in the snow it looks like i was dancing in circles which explains the frozen puke
I had to photo shop your nipple piercings. that was extremely awkward.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
Randomize
